Django Wexler

Part One.

The continuing adventures of the Gideon Dynasty.

When we last left our heroes, Abyssinia had just taken out most of the Shirazids, and I was looking to take the lands of Gondar, my immediate southern neighbor.  Unfortunately I lack a good claim on Gondar, so I set my chancellor to falsifying the appropriate documents and wait.  

The Iconoclasts appear to have taken over the Byzantine Empire, which is interesting historically if not particularly relevant to me.

Not much left of Orthodoxy!

King Oda Gosh of Abyssinia has died, and the throne has passed to his brother Ayzur.  Unfortunately there’s a lot of Solomonids so getting someone from my dynasty on the throne is going to take a lot of work.

King Ayzur wants money for his warchest, but I’m not THAT loyal.  I need that money for my own wars!

Gondar follows my lead and swears loyalty to Abyssinia.  That doesn’t mean I can’t attack them but it makes it a little riskier.  I switch to trying to forge a claim on Gojjam, since they’re still independent.

Duke Gideon Gideon claims to love his daughter Semhar!  This will become important later.

More formerly independent counties around Damot swear loyalty to Abyssinia.

King Ayzur decides to kick off a war with the Arwadids, across the straights in Arabia.  Not a terrible move as long as the Abbassids don’t get involved.  I cautiously send some troops to loot while avoiding the main armies.

Once again the computer sucks at warring.  It happily lets small enemy armies unite rather than crush them.

Also, I start building a hospital in Semien, on the grounds that it might help with disease and such.

Overqualified Jews in search of employment keep randomly turning up at my court, which is fine with me!

Then things get … weird.

That seems normal enough.  Might lead to “It’s good to be the Duke!”

A nun, eh?  Well, being friends with Christians doesn’t seem like it could HURT.  There’s a lot of them after all.  Sure, she can stay!

 

Or she could turn out to be fucking Death incarnate.  Obviously I have to challenge her to a chess game, since my young Duke apparently only has a 20% chance of overpowering a nun with a dagger.

Fortunately she likes chess.  Although I notice she doesn’t actually promise to spare me if I win.

I … uh, don’t actually have very good stats for chess …

Duke Gideon Gideon, having apparently lost his queen, bets his daughter’s life in order to get it back.  Double or nothing indeed!  Honestly though, getting a queen back is pretty strong, right?

Apparently not.  

Sooooo Duke Gideon Gideon dies under “suspicious circumstances” along with his daughter Semhar, leaving his 10-year-old son Mekonnen as the sole surviving member of the family.  Though what Gideon did to merit a personal visit from Death is still beyond me.  Long live the Duke!

At this point, King Ayzur’s war is still blundering along, not really getting anywhere.  I’m looking at a six-year regency, which is unfortunate.  But my chancellor finally has some luck, and forges a deed to the county of Gojjam!

Thankfully, my regent and council approve immediate war.  I hire some mercenaries and crush Gojjam in a very short campaign.  Hurrah!  The first real addition to my domain!

The remaining country next to Gojjam quickly swears fealty to Abyssinia.  Ayzur wraps up his inconclusive war, but in his weakened state one of his new vassals demands a change to elective monarchy!  I would actually happily join this rebellion, since I want elective monarchy too, but nobody asked me.  I’m always last picked for the team, sob.  So I guess I’m a loyalist.

In typical AI fashion, Ayzur starts laying siege to rebel castles, while right next door the rebels are laying siege to the nearest loyalist castles.  Which happen to be mine.  *headdesk*

My capital may be occupied by rebel troops, but at least the Duke is grown up!  Even if he has only managed to become a mediocre bureaucrat.

I marry him off as quickly as possible, since I desperately need some sons.  Sela seems like a better choice, even if she doesn’t like me.

Good news, my wife is pregnant!  Bad news, my land is still occupied, and now a powerful Abassid faction has declared war on Abyssinia, which is leaving Ayzur a bit overtaxed.  I’ve got my own tiny forces together, and I’m doing my best to liberate my castles to weaken the rebels.

A son!  If only there were a few less rebel troops about.  Fortunately, a few Christian allies have sent troops to help fight the Abassids.

Me liberating them from rebels apparently encouraged the people of Semien to return to the faith!

Ayzur finally gets the rebels to surrender.  Unfortunately, he’s losing the war with the Abassids rather badly, and I haven’t got much to throw in the balance.  On the up side, my wife gives birth to twin girls!

King Ayzur finally gets up the nerve to fight the Abassid army, and I pull together my troops to help.  We have a slight edge in numbers.

As we’re trying to force an engagement, a Monophysite rebellion breaks out!  That’s, uh, poorly timed.

We finally manage a showdown while the Monophysites rampage.  Victory!  

Ayzur crushes the impudent peasants before the Abassids can regroup, then settles in to retake some castles.  In the meanwhile, I’m recovering my strength and eyeing Gondar, which was so unkind to me while it was in rebellion.

Apparently the lesson didn’t take because another Monophysite revolt breaks out.  And yet another Muslim prince has declared a holy war for Abyssinia.  But I’ve generated a false claim, and quickly defeat the men of Gondor Gondar and add it to my realm!

The Abassids have finally been convinced to give up their war, but the Qadir are more stubborn.  Meanwhile, my steward is planning long-range training expeditions.  Keeping his eye on the ball, I guess.  I certainly need the money.  And it turns out quite profitably, giving me both cash and increased stewardship.

My youngest son has the flu …

…there’s another Monophysite rebellion …

…and one of my daughters has cancer.  This pretty much feels like an average day now.

My clever chancellor forges a deed to the other half of Gondar, and I take it with the aid of more mercenaries.  So my coffers are pretty empty, but I’m up to five counties, which makes me one of the stronger nobles in Abyssinia.  Progress!  Unless of course the Abassids come back to kick our asses.

Current Year: 801 AD.  Current Status: Cautiously Optimistic.